Being civilized is very necessary for everyone. As a student, we should be polite and have civilized habits. And I think our students can do many things to show our good quality.（段评：作为说明文的开头,你清晰点明了文明的重要性和学生应有的文明习惯,观点明确！不过可以优化: 1. 词汇重复:“good quality”可以用更准确的“civilized qualities”来替换,更贴合主题。 2. 句式单调:可以将简单句合并,使用连接词使表达更流畅。修改版：Being civilized is very necessary for everyone. As students,we should be polite and develop civilized habits. I think we can do many things to show our civilized qualities.）
We should be polite to everyone, not only our teachers and parents, but the other people around us. We should be friendly too. Keep a smile on the face (改：Keeping a smile on our face) can make us look friendly and easy to get along with. Also, we should be helpful. Help the people in need and they may help us when we are in trouble. Respect our teachers and parents. Listen to them carefully when they talk to us. Don't look around when they are talking, and we should look at their eyes if necessary. If they say something wrong, don't get angry. We can explain politely after they complete their words.（段评：这段详细列举了文明行为,内容充实！但有几处可以改进: 1. 非谓语错误:“Keep a smile on the face”应改为“Keeping a smile on our face”,动名词作主语更符合语法规则。 2. 逻辑连接:可以添加“First”“Second”等连接词,使列举更有条理。 3. 代词使用:“the other people”应改为“other people”,不需要定冠词the。修改版：First,we should be polite to everyone,not only our teachers and parents,but also other people around us. We should be friendly too. Keeping a smile on our face can make us look friendly and easy to get along with. Second,we should be helpful. If we help people in need,they may help us when we are in trouble. Third,we should respect our teachers and parents. We should listen to them carefully when they talk to us. Don't look around; instead,we should look at their eyes if necessary. If they say something wrong,don't get angry. We can explain politely after they finish speaking.）
In a word, polite quality (改：civilized quality) is very important to have. We need to improve ourselves harder (改：improve ourselves more) . Try to be a civilized student, and we may have a brighter future and get successful (改：achieve success) more easily.（段评：结尾总结了文明品质的重要性,呼应了开头！但可以优化: 1. 词汇重复:“very important”可以用“of great importance”替换,更高级。 2. 句式优化:“get successful more easily”可以改为“achieve success more easily”,更符合英语表达习惯。修改版：In a word,polite and civilized qualities are of great importance. We need to work harder to improve ourselves. If we try to be civilized students,we may have a brighter future and achieve success more easily.）
